I saw this quote this morning and it really spoke to me. It spoke to me in terms of myself and some of the patterns that I notice within my own life, and it spoke to me in terms of my work. I work with many people who cannot understand why they constantly repeat negative patterns and behaviours throughout their lives and they find it hard to understand why these will not just 'go away'.
The issue that I think is the most important to think about in terms of negative patterns and behaviours, is that knowing that you do it does not make it go. The process involves, understanding why we do it, learning about what has brought us to the place that we do it, forgiving and accepting those parts of ourselves, and finding new ways of moving forward without the negative patterns of behaviour.
This is not an easy pattern to break, especially when it results in the use of defences, and manifests in anxiety disorders or depressive conditions. If you think in terms of some negative behaviours, they can impact your entire life. They can lead you to attract negative relationships, they can lead you to be negative towards yourself, they can lead to phobias, anxiety or OCD type behaviour. These are not easy patterns to remove.
'Repair' is the word that struck a chord with me in this quote though. We all have the ability and the opportunity for repair. Repair starts from within. We need to repair the negative relationship that we have with ourselves, and we need to repair how we treat ourselves. We need to offer ourselves acceptance and forgiveness and we need to learn to love ourselves. How can we move forward without any of this?
That is why I truly believe in what I do. I really believe in the power of self exploration and the power of 'talking'. I really believe that by giving yourself the time to talk, explore, understand and forgive, you will be giving yourself that chance of repairing yourself. Repairing your relationship with yourself, before you even start to focus on others' relationships with you. It is such an important process and one that I think everyone should have the chance to experience.
Anxiety, depression, OCD, personality and mood disorders. The range of mental illnesses are vast and devastating. But being able to talk and being able to understand yourself and to start to repair the damage could help to begin to move forward in a much more positive way. I am not saying it is an easy journey, but it is a journey that is possible, and it is a journey that you deserve to give yourself a chance to try.